This past year has made me discover so much about myself that I didn’t know before. I’ve come to the wonderful realization that I do not need material things to make me happy. And I don’t say this in any self-righteous way. The pretty shoes and diamonds are certainly nice to have and I will still continue to buy them but I just seem to have gotten off that wheel of never ending want. Want is a bottomless pit and I know all too well the discontent and misery that greed breeds (that was not meant to rhyme). At some point last year these things just stopped making me happy. If the last year has taught me anything it has been to just stop and enjoy today. Enjoy everything I have especially the people in my life. Again it hasn’t changed me so drastically that I’m now this sandal wearing, will work-for-food living hippie that has thrown up her job to back pack across Europe and Asia (cough cough) but I’ve also realized that despite our best plans and the most well organized strategies one has no control over tomorrow. All we can do is be thankful for today. Last year for those 5 days in September, I never thought of the next promotion or the next hike, I never thought of how I needed to do better than everyone my age, all I wanted was for my family to have Christmas together, to enjoy my mother’s cooking and grumble at my father and his slightly Scrooge-esque ways, to spend Christmas eve with my extended family and to be happy. And together. Nothing else mattered and even though that dreadful experience is just a distant memory, it taught me to put everything in perspective.
My greatest blessings are not the assets I’ve been fortunate enough to have; it is the fantastic circle of unfailing support that I’m surrounded with. I’ve made best friends out of colleagues and cut my losses with others I’ve known for years. I no longer feel the need to have people around me just to validate all my actions even if those actions have been unkind to another. Neither do I feel the need to keep relationships (not the boy girl kind but relationships of all kinds) even when I’ve grown out of them. I no longer feel like I need to keep friends who constantly take it upon themselves to give me reality checks. This past year I’ve met wonderful people, people I don’t always have something in common with but people whom I respect and more importantly people who understand that every relationship no matter how close has boundaries which must never be crossed.